Frustration sums up where I feel I am at right now. If you asked me 2 years ago when we thought we would start a family, I would have said that we would start trying in the Spring of 2013. Fast forward to the 1st day of graduate school in 2011 and suddenly we are told that our program no longer will be over in December 2013, but instead it will go until May 2014. Ok, deep breath, not the biggest deal in the world. Baby plans could get pushed back a few months if necessary.....or maybe moved up a few months.
Fast forward to summer of 2012, baby plans are back in conversation. I come off the pill in August, we start trying in October, and October 25th we find our we are pregnant! WE ARE EXCITED!!! November 26th rolls around and the excitement plunges as we learn there is no heartbeat. D&C is completed on November 28th. Now where do we go?
A conversation with my Grad School Program Director reveals the frustrating reality that baby plans (post miscarriage) will have to be put on hold again until August 2013 if I plan on graduating with the rest of my class. Ok, I can handle this, just a short 9 month set back (filled with dozens of births and pregnancy announcements of friends).
So that leads me to where I am today. I've been approached by my Grad School Fieldwork Coordinator to ask about my "baby plans." To sum it up, if we plan on TTC again this fall, I will have to reconsider my fieldwork placement. I was fortunate to be placed at a top notch Spinal Cord & Traumatic Brain Injury Rehab facility here in Philadelphia. Some people would kill to have a fieldwork experience there. The reality though is, if I end up being pregnant this fall, this facility will not be an ideal place for me to be. It is very intense, fast paced, and physically demanding. Not an ideal situation for what could potentially (hopefully) be my 1st trimester.
My fieldwork coordinator has presented me with 3 options:
1) Switch fieldwork locations now (and give up an opportunity to be at one of the most highly regarded facilities in the area) in anticipation that I may be pregnant this fall
2) Don't switch now, but take the chance that if I do end up getting pregnant, they may have to move me to a different facility in the middle of my rotation (which puts me at risk for not graduating on time)
3) Push back baby plans another 3 months and complete my rotation at this facility.
I know in the grand scheme of things, waiting another 3 months is not all that big of a deal. However, it has been an emotional roller coaster and I want to make sure that I make my decision based on the right reasons.
